Posted On: December 7, 2019
Do you notice your “Why” or “How come” questions? Such as… Why this happening? Why is this happening again? Why is this happening to me? Why does this happen? Why does this happen to me? Why does this keep happening? Why don’t I see this happening to others? Why don’t I hear this happening to […]
Posted On: December 2, 2019
It took me a while to finish reading this book because carrying it around for weeks doesn’t mean a book gets read – you actually need to read it, and I finally did. It took me a while because I really wanted to absorb not just the words, but the essence of who Dr Tererai […]
Posted On: December 1, 2019
I didn’t grow up in a well-to-do family. I didn’t study in some elite school. Yet there is one thing I learned unconsciously from watching my parents: the “helper” spirit. My dad used to volunteer in the neighbourhood residents committee (RC). One of the things I remember doing alongside him regularly was going door-to-door collecting […]
Posted On: November 24, 2019
Today, somebody complimented me on my eyes. It reminded me of my mom who repeatedly told me that I have almond-shaped eyes, and a melon-shaped face whenever I asked her anything about my looks. It wasn’t never expressed as a compliment, but as a fact. Younger me: “Mom, be honest with me… am I beautiful?” […]
Posted On: November 21, 2019
A few months ago, I caught up with an acquaintance and this was how the conversation went: Me: “You know my mom passed away last year?” Her: “Yeah I know…” (with an empathetic look) “How are you?” Me: “I still miss her.” (start to tear up – one of those days I guess) Her: “You […]
Posted On: November 21, 2019
Why I do what I do is a weekly series where AsiaOne showcases uncommon professions and what it takes to go down that career path. In their final episode, they feature me (Dr Martha Tara Lee, a clinical sexologist and relationship counsellor). Having a desire at a young age to understand sex and how it […]
Posted On: November 14, 2019
Even before I could read, I would remember the sounds of the mornings: when my dad would open the door to the flat to collect his ordered daily The Straits Times, turn on the light in the living room, and proceed to read it. He doesn’t know it (maybe he will now) but this is […]
Posted On: November 5, 2019
I used to hate ‘small talk’ and know people who hate it too – preferring ‘big talk’ instead. Small talk is when you talk about something or anything of unimportant or uncontroversial matters. Yet even small talk is very telling of people. Depending on their answer, One can tell whether they are open, curious, happy, […]
Posted On: November 1, 2019
Every teacher has a teacher. I hired my first coach at 24 when I was going through my first divorce. She, however, violated coaching ethics by calling me on the phone (while we were still undergoing coaching) crying about how worried she was about paying her flat instalment, and screaming about one of her trainees […]
Posted On: October 29, 2019
I have been practising as a Clinical Sexologist and Sexuality Educator since 2009 – long before it was fashionable, or sexy, or money-making to talk about sex and sexuality in Singapore, or for that matter in Asia as an Asian. Many people ask me why I do what I do. I am passionate about supporting […]
Posted On: October 27, 2019
This is my all-time favourite quote because these words seemed to transcend time and space, and spoke to me when I was contemplating divorce with my then husband…. It felt like she was speaking directly to me: “You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in […]
Posted On: October 22, 2019
When I was going through my divorce, the last thing I wanted to do was go into circle with other women going through the same thing because I did not view what I was going through as same-same as others. I didn’t want to be surrounded by more pain, negativity, fears, drama, and stories. […]
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