A lot of people don’t like talking about sex. But what if you didn’t have to? Instead, this is an invite to reflect on: What’s your last great sexual experience look like? Was it a one-night stand? A passionate affair? A quickie at the office? Or did it involve your partner in front of a fireplace, with soft music playing in the background and a fire burning in the hearth?
Whatever it was, ask yourself: What made it great? What would make it better? Why did you like it? How could you make it even more enjoyable next time around?
We’re not saying that every sexual encounter must be mind-blowing—but when we think back on our best sexual experiences, they usually had certain elements—and knowing what those are can help us build our own understanding of what makes us tick.
It’s important to reflect on your own experiences because they help you get to know yourself more. Your desires may change over time, and that’s okay! In fact, it’s probably a good thing.
What did your last great sexual experience look like?
Sometimes I feel like we don’t talk enough about how important it is to take time to ask ourselves what works for us when it comes to sex. Whether it’s by yourself or with another person, knowing what makes us feel good and then going for it can be one of the most empowering experiences we have in our lives. And when we start talking about these things openly, we can learn from each other—and from ourselves—how to make even better choices later down the road.
No doubt you’ve heard of OMGYES‘ revolutionary approach to vulva-based pleasure and if you haven’t, you are in for a treat!
For relationship counseling and/ or sexuality counseling, do contact me here.
About Dr. Martha Tara Lee
Dr. Martha Tara Lee has been a passionate advocate for positive sexuality since 2007. With a Doctorate in Human Sexuality and a Masters in Counseling, she launched Eros Coaching in 2009 to help individuals and couples lead self-actualised and pleasurable lives. Her expertise includes working with couples who have unconsummated marriage, individuals with sexual inhibitions and discrepancies in sexual desire, men with erection and ejaculation concerns, and members of the LGBTQIA+ and kink communities. Dr. Lee welcomes all sexual orientations and is available for online and face-to-face consultations. Martha speaks English and Mandarin.
She is the only certified sexuality educator by the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT) in the region (as of 2011) and is also an AASECT certified sexuality educator supervisor (as of 2018). She strives to provide fun, educational, and sex-positive events and is often cited in the media including Huffington Post, Newsweek, South China Morning Post, and more. She is the appointed Resident Sexologist for Singapore Cancer Society, Of Noah.sg, OfZoey.sg, and Virtus Fertility Centre. She is the host of radio show Eros Evolution for OMTimes Radio. In recognition of her work, she was named one of ‘Top 50 Inspiring Women under 40’ by Her World in July 2010, and one of ‘Top 100 Inspiring Women’ by CozyCot in March 2011. She is the author of Love, Sex and Everything In-Between (2013), Orgasmic Yoga: Masturbation, Meditation and Everything In-Between (2015), From Princess to Queen: Heartbreaks, Heartgasms and Everything In-Between (2017), and {Un}Inhihibited (2019).
You can read the testimonials she’s received over years here. For her full profile, click here. Email her here.