Language is ever evolving and new words are developed to better communicate what we mean. Check the new relationship and sex terms I wrote about in 2017 which was published in Huffington Post!
This year, I decided to gathering new words that I’ve learned.
These are my new words from 2022! Let me know if they are new to you?
- Autosexual – People who tend to prefer masturbation over partnered sex, although they may engage in partnered sex either to show affection, to feel close with their partners, or because they get pleasure out of it—just generally not as much as solo sex.
- Concept Creep – A concept has crept when it’s used to describe a wider range of experiences than it used to.
- Cobwebbing – Holding on to past relationships – whether that be phone numbers, messages, or even an old t-shirt – can hold you back when it comes to dating as you’re not mentally focussed on the present.
- Female-Led Relationships – Like a Master/slave dynamic in which the Master (or, in this case, Mistress) is in total control of the slave, an FLR is similar to 24/7 BDSM relationships, in that the FLR is typically a full-time relationship style, not limited just to sexy times.
- Gray Rocking – The act of being disengaged or unresponsive to set boundaries in communication with manipulative or narcissistic people.
- Goblin mode – A type of behaviour which is unapologetically self-indulgent, lazy, slovenly, or greedy, typically in a way that rejects social norms or expectations.
- Hardballing – Also called “dating with intention,” encourages people to be upfront about their romantic goals from the very first interaction. If you’re looking for a serious relationship, say it on the first date. If you’re not looking to have kids, express that early on. The point is to be straightforward.
- Hepeating – When a woman suggests an idea and it’s ignored, but then a guy says same thing and everyone loves it.
- Kremlin – A sex move, involving rubbing the clit over a woman’s pants.
- Queening – An ancient art in which a woman presses and rubs her genitalia and/or anus against the tongue, lips, and nose of her subordinate.
- Pretty Privilege – Used when someone who is more attractive based on societal beauty standards is granted more opportunities and lenience.
- Side – A designation that upends the binary that has historically dominated gay male culture. Sides are men who find fulfillment in every kind of sexual act except anal penetration.
- Relationship Anarchy – Often abbreviated RA, RA is an approach to relationships that involves individuals defining and governing those relationships on their own terms, independent of traditional societal norms.
- Tool – Someone who lacks the mental capacity to know he or she is being used.
- Vabbing – An act of dabbing the vagina and then apply what you collect on your wrist, neck, and/or behind your ears (aka vaginal secretions), as if it was a perfume, in hopes of attracting a mate. The basis of it being that pheromones are chemicals capable of acting like hormones outside the body of the secreting individual, to affect the behavior of the receiving individuals.
There you go! From A to V, all 15 of them. Do you have some more new words to suggest to me – this Gen X?
Source:
- Corbett, K. (2022, July 8). Does Vabbing Actually Work? Some TikTokers Swear By It. Distractify. https://www.distractify.com/p/what-does-vabbing-mean-tiktok
- Don’t Be A Tool! (2022). Qlik Blog. https://www.qlik.com/blog/dont-be-a-tool
- Men are getting the credit for women’s work through something called “hepeating” — here’s what it means. (2018, March 8). Business Insider. https://www.businessinsider.com/what-is-hepeating-2017-9
- thebody.com. (2022, August 6). The Body. https://www.thebody.com/article/female-led-relationships-give-women-control
- Gibson, A. (2022, August 5). Here’s What Benching Indicates And Why It’s So Worse Than Being Ghosted. List23: Latest U.S. & World News. https://list23.com/1000469-here-s-what-benching-indicates-and-why-it-s-so-worse-than-being-ghosted/
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Kibbe, K. (2022, July 6). What Is Relationship Anarchy? Are You a Relationship Anarchist?InsideHook. https://www.insidehook.com/article/sex-and-dating/relationship-anarchy
- “Metaverse” lost the word of the year contest to “goblin mode.” (2022, December 5). Business Insider. https://www.businessinsider.com/metaverse-loses-oxford-word-of-the-year-contest-goblin-mode-2022-12?international=true&r=US&IR=T
- Prendergast, C. (2022, July 20). Therapy dialect is a thing right now—but could it be toxic?Vogue Singapore. https://vogue.sg/therapy-speak/
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Tan, A. (2022, May 25). Are otters treated differently from wild boars in S’pore due to “pretty privilege”? Mothership.SG. https://mothership.sg/2022/05/otters-pretty-privilege/
- Thomson, L. (2022, October 27). “Cobwebbing” is the new dating trend prompting you to clear out exes. Metro. https://metro.co.uk/2022/10/27/cobwebbing-is-the-new-dating-trend-prompting-you-to-clear-out-exes-17650914/
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Ryu, J. U. T. (2022, March 8). What is “hardballing”? How to “date with intention.” USA TODAY. https://eu.usatoday.com/story/life/health-wellness/2022/02/02/hardballing-viral-dating-trend-explained/9254340002/?gnt-cfr=1
- Zane, Z. (2021, August 5). “Queening” Is the Oral Sex Position You Need to Know. Men’s Health. https://www.menshealth.com/sex-women/a37213145/queening-sex-position/?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=social-media&utm_campaign=socialflowFBMH
- Urban Dictionary: kremlin. (2022). Urban Dictionary. https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=kremlin
About Dr. Martha Tara Lee
Surrounded by friends who were sexually inhibited and struck by dire lack of positive conversations around sex and sexuality in Singapore, Dr. Martha Tara Lee set out to make a positive difference in embarking on her doctorate in human sexuality before launching Eros Coaching in 2009. Today, she remains dedicated to working with individuals and couples who wish to lead self-actualised and pleasure-filled lives.
She also holds certificates in counselling, coaching and sex therapy, and her fourth degree – a Masters in Counselling in May 2018. In practice since 2009, she is the only certified sexuality educator and certified sexuality educator supervisor by the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT) in Singapore.
Often cited in the media, Dr. Lee is the appointed Clinical Sexologist for Singapore Cancer Society. She was recognised as one of ‘Top 50 Inspiring Women Under 40′ by Her World in July 2010, and one of ‘Top 100 Inspiring Women’ by CozyCot in March 2011. She has published four books: Love, Sex and Everything In-Between, Orgasmic Yoga, From Princess to Queen and {Un}Inhibited.
Martha works with individuals and couples in private coaching sessions, and conducts her own workshops. She takes prides in making sure all her workshops are also fun, educational, and sex-positive. This comes easily to her because even though she is extremely dedicated and serious about her work, she fundamentally believes that sex is meant to be fun, wonderful, amazing and sacred. As such, this serious light-heartedness has shone through again and again. For her full profile, click here. Email her here.