I have an online radio show called Eros Evolution at 5 a.m. every week.

Thought not ideal, this time would be 4p.m. EST in the United States where most listeners were expected to be based.

To prepare for the show at 5 a.m., I’ve been waking up at 4 a.m.

At 4a.m., I am not ready to speak to anybody much less host a radio show. However to prepare myself, I do some vocal exercises, stretches, drink some hot water, meditate, and surrender to a Higher Power.

But this morning, I missed my own radio show!

All I can say was that I slept through my alarm clock.

It was set. It must have rang. But I didn’t get up.

I had simply crashed.

What screwed up my body clock was the start of module three of my couples relationship coaching training at 3 a.m. Singapore time (and 4p.m. eastern in the United States) on Wednesday 11 Feb. Class runs twice a week – every Tuesday and Thursday (which is my Wednesday and Friday) and lasts 1.5 hours, for seven weeks.

Once I complete module three, I’d only have one more level to graduation. I’ve been waiting for more than six months for a module three class to run.

I didn’t want to miss this run. Never mind that the second session was scheduled one hour before my radio show – maybe my lab class (practicum group) would be willing to shift the time to another day. Nope.

Maybe if I can just last till March 8 where the time zone change kicks in – one hour back, I’d be ok. As it turned out, no.

I told myself – mind over body.

However my body was already tired from not being able to go back to sleep on Wednesday morning. This resulting in me working more than 12 hours straight from 3 a.m. onwards, continuing to tax my body through Thursday, and then blacking out Thursday evening through Friday 7:30 a.m.

I woke up more than two hour after the start of my radio show.

I felt horrible because I’ve let down the good folks at OMTimes Radio, my wonderful guest whom I was so looking forward to connecting with – Monique Darling, and the listeners who showed up… when the host didn’t!

Each episode is recorded live, and re-played five more times that week (Sunday at 7:00am, Monday at 8:00pm, Wednesday at 3:00pm, Friday at 4:00am, Saturday at 11:00am – all Eastern time)! So a missed episode is more than one show… it’s six!

So this is how I missed not just my online skype training for my couples coaching training at 3 a.m., but also my own radio show at 5 a.m!

I did have a 10 a.m. meeting at Novena MRT. I got over enough of my own shock, anger and frustration with myself to have a nice catch-up session.

What else is one to do? We began laughing about my horrible morning. These were the lesssons that came up:

1. It gets better. There’s can’t possibly be anything worse than missing your own show!
2. It probably did have to get worse. I already made some mistakes… but missing my show is the worst by far! Anything else that happens from now on is only going to be good.
3. Better now than later. Better to make all (or most) of my mistakes now early on in my radio show than later.
4. Learn from my mistakes. It’s human to have mistakes, but important to learn from them – and try not to repeat them.
5. Kill them with kindness. The nicer your guest, the worse you feel. Monique, true to her name, was a darling about it all, and only said this on Facebook message, “We can reschedule :)”. You may wish to follow her work here.
6. Actually most people are really nice. The more successful a person, the nicer they tend to be. They’ve been there, done that including having made their own mistakes, and as such, can sometimes be really cool about it all. My big boo-boo is a case in point.

What I will do:

1. Drop out of couple coaching training for now.
2. Sleep early/ nap more the day before the radio show.
3. Set at least another alarm clock.

Some of the other mistakes I’ve made so far on Eros Evolution:

• First show – Had 7 minutes of radio silence not knowing how to patch my guest in. I could have, and should have done a trial test. My fingers were ice-cold from nervousness beforehand.
• Fourth show – Not been prepared for what to say when my guest dropped off the line at least four times during the show due to bad internet connections.
• Pause fillers. Said countless: “So…”, “I’m just curious…”

I am checking if Monique Darling is available to appear on Thurs 30 April 4p.m. Eastern time right now. This was my last message to her today: “I feel absolutely awful. I will write a blog post about it… and that might actually give you more publicity. Yes let’s schedule…”

What can I say, other than try to make the best of this situation.

Follow my radio show Eros Evolution here, and listen to past episodes here. You just might listen to more comedy of errors, or learn something useful about sexuality and spirituality on my show!

Crossing my fingers.

Who is Martha?

Dr. Martha Tara Lee is Founder and Clinical Sexologist of Eros Coaching. She is a certified sexologist with a Doctorate in Human Sexuality. She provides sexuality and relationship coaching for individuals and couples, conducts sexual education workshops and speaks at public events. She is the author of the book Love, Sex and Everything In-Between, and the host of the weekly radio show Eros Evolution on OMTimes Radio. For more, visit www.ErosCoaching.com or email info@eroscoaching.com.

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